blogs are nuisances. because people tend to reveal too much. so. yes, i'm gonna stop blogging. but i'm gonna keep this here for old time's sake. besides, i like my older posts, which were filled with boredom. i guess i'll go back to diary-ing.
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so people, dont bother ever visiting my blog ever again, i'm not gonna post anything up.
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and happy birthday xuan and derek. sorry, no caps this time. seriously not in the mood.
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to all my loyal blog fans (if i have any to start with) i'm sorry, but i think not having a blog is much better. there are plenty of better blogs out there anyway.
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sayonara everyone.
oh yes, dont bother tagging. because tags would cause problems too. thanks for tagging in the past anyway, really appreciate all the support.
guess what. my mom read my blog. read that post. oh well, i guess it would happen. i've nothing against my mom reading my blog. i mean, ya. but it still feels a little weird. guess she felt something wasnt right, so, yea my blog. well, moms are weird, in a really respectable way. they're freaky, as in they know exactly what's going on in your mind. well, that's for my mom. even if we do not say anything, dont do anything, she'll know something's going on! even on the phone! she'll just ask randomly, is everything okay when everything isnt okay. i mean moms know EXACTLY what's going on through your mind. it's like they can read your mind! take yesterday for example. i came back, trying to put on a straight face. i mean obviously things werent going right. but i didnt wanna be bombarded with questions. but she still asked what was wrong. and i just used the excuse that i was thinking what to do next. i dont think she bought it. but oh well, i managed to escape. i dont know, i just.. ehh. i really really dont know how to put it into words.
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today was okay. though i aint exactly having the time of my life right now, it was okay. i guess. it was just pretty boring cuz it was mass revision. then after school, there wasnt much to do. i mean now that there isnt homework, i feel kinda lost. that's how pathetic my life is. i feel lost without homework. so i went home, and slacked.
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alright, i dont feel like blogging now.
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oh yes, HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY MUIMUI!!!!!!! i'm really glad you like the gift. it makes the whole trip to get your gift worthwhile. =) may all your dreams come true and God bless.
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toodles
simple/elpmis
9:23 PM
Monday, May 15, 2006
yay. exam's over. wee.
okay. exams are over. i did have fun today. so thanks mui, aishu and junqiang. the pastamania-ing, the movie-ing, the spastic-ing, the way home-ing. yea. thanks a lot. if not for you guys, i'ld have probably been alone. oh well.
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but i learnt a very important lesson today. one that i've learnt before, but seemed to have forgotten. and now, i learn again. but i guess it's a little too late huh. i wont mention names here, nor would i push the blame to anyone. i have no one to blame but myself. why was i so naive? so gullible. to think i could actually find someone to talk to. seriously, when i first told you that, i felt like "hey! finally, someone i can tell what i never dared tell anyone before!" and you didnt even make me feel bad or laugh at me when i told you that horrible truth about myself the horrible truth that i darent tell anyone, that i have never dared tell anyone in my entire life. well, it isnt really a horrible truth. i wouldnt wanna give to much info here. horrible truth's just the best word i can think of right now. anyway, back to the point. i dont care if you did tell anyone else, or whatever excuse or reason, if you'ld like to call it that way, you give. i dont want to know either. like i said, i'm not gonna push the blame. i've only me, myself and i to blame. why did i have to go around blabbering? why couldnt i just shut up? havent i already learnt that lesson? that shutting up is better most of the time? well, obviously i forgot. and i'll make sure i never forget that ever again. i'm gonna shut myself up. i'm not gonna tell anything to anyone. i will not trust anyone. sure, i'll have friends. but i wont tell them anything close to my heart. i wont tell them anything risky. i'll just keep everything to myself. and i mean everything. who cares if people think i'm an introvert. does it matter? at least i wont have such shitty problems coming up. not that shitty problems are coming up. but they will. it's just a matter of time. why was i sooo stupid? what made me think that a secret could stop at a person? c'mon. gosh i'm so dumb! yes people, wanna say i'm stupid? i'm dumb? go ahead. now's a very nice time to say i'm dumb. cause i am. i really am. goshhhhh. i cant believe it. you know what? i really need that time machine now. i wanna turn back time. i wanna turn myself into a person that wouldnt say anything. a person that can survive shutting up. seriously! if i didnt say anything from the start. none of this would have happened. but NOOOOO!!! i just had to talk so much about myself. yes. i got myself into this pithole. i just couldnt shut my trap, could i. and thank you to that particular person. i'm not trying to be sarcastic here. i'm not. if not for this wake up call, who knows what else i'ld have said, and get myself into deeper shit. what's the worst part? i cant bear to not talk to you. i'm not angry at you. i dont hate you. i really dont. i'm just very, VERY, confused now. as if i wasnt confused enough before. argh. yes, i'm frustrated. i'm frustrated at myself. i'm angry at myself. not anyone else, but myself. maybe i aint that angry at flustered by such stuff, as i was before, because i'm numb to it already. but little missy here just wouldnt learn her lesson. she just didnt wanna learn her lesson. little missy is me by the way. why didnt i listen to those around me? i guess it's true when they say you're already lucky if you have one close friend. cuz some might never find them at all. tsktsk. and of all days for this to come, it has to come right when the exams ended. i have so many things on my mind. but i dont know how to put them to words. way to celebrate the end of exams huh.
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so you people think you have problems? c'mon. suck it up. everyone's got problems. arent i sucking my problem up too? you cant expect life to be smooth-sailing. if it was, you'll never appreciate the happy part of your life. soooo. i'll just wait, and wait, and wait, for this tormenting period of my life to go to past. and hopefully, the fun part will come soon after. i hope.
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to all those people out there having a better time than i am right now? enjoy it while you can. heh. and cheerios. exams are over. wee. -.-
simple/elpmis
7:28 PM
Sunday, May 14, 2006
sunday shmunday le hunday! o.
today's mother's day! yupp. so to all the mothers out there.. HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY!!
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alright. today was okay. i managed to stay up during the sermon, and NOT feel restless. that's a pretty good improvement if you asked me. and lunch wasnt so bad. joyce jie and gracie were with me, and we went home together later. so i didnt feel so aimless in church. thanks girls! :) so after lunch at church, we went home, and i came online. and my loooong lost friend, derek, talked to me. lols. it's been such a long time since we last talked. okay, let's see, i knew him through my friend's brother's friend's friend's friend. lols! okay, some of ya'll might say this isnt safe. but i'm very sure.. he's the only friend that i know this way. so yea, we talked, and i started talking about my hair. o.O" okay. and he wasnt that for it. but! i'm still gonna cut my hair anyway. it'll grow back. hopefully, quickly, if it isnt nice. oh well. so my afternoon was pretty okay. i mean i caught up with a friend i have not talked to in a long long long long long while. yupps.
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so that was pretty much my day. alrighty, i better go now. my mom's nagging. i have not bathed yet. =XX. lols.
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toodles!
good luck for the paper tomorrow you guys! =DD
simple/elpmis
8:07 PM
Saturday, May 13, 2006
"as for me and my mouse, we will serve the Lord"
the quote from the title is from the invited speaker last week. nono. he isnt quoting the bible wrongly. he just said in this modern era, instead of as for me and my household, they should add in mouse. he was addressing the problem about porn. anyway, if you dont get it it's okay. haha.
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okay. ltg today? wasnt as bad as i thought it would be. i mean we managed to spend 4 hours out! we walked and walked and talked and shopped, and took pictures. and who said girls where the weaker sex? i mean girls definitely walk more than guys. all that shopping does help. haha. so first, we met up, and ate some jap food that i have no idea what it's called. but it was verrrry filling. then, we started walking around ps (again... xDD) anyway, a skirt caught my eye. but i didnt wanna buy infront of them. i dont know why. haha. besides, i was still thinking if i should buy it. so anyway, we then proceeded to heeren. then we walked and walked. took neos. here they are...
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uhh. this was very random.
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oh gosh i look horrible. but they look nice. heh.
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yet another one
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yupp. spastic. i absolutely loove this picture. look at xiang yi!! bwahahahahah. she's the one in green btw. =))
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then we carried on walking, and i saw a few tops that MIGHT be nice. i dont know. i din go pay attention. but at least i have a rough idea where to get clothes. i'm in dire need of clothings. argh. anyway. then after that, we still had an hour to kill, so we went on to cine. and there, we went to tcc and sat for another hour. well, i guess all of them arent that bad. oh yes, the people in the prints are my ltg. for all you know, i might feel happy in church again. i mean i hope so. but this group is just part of the rest. i mean the minority! there's still the majority. okay, i know this part is phrased pretty weirdly. but oh well. all the scanning has drained my brain. it takes alot of brains to scan pictures okay.
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so after that, i really really decided to get that skirt. so gracie, my sis and i went back to ps. besides, we have to go there to go back home. WE ARE THE NEL-ERS!! okay, that was random. anyway, then we went back. and i got the skirt!!!!!!!! but it cost 40 bucks. it's a brown skirt. so really really really excited that i have one more piece of cloth to add to my very pathetic wardrobe, we carried on to the neoprint machine AGAIN! okay, let me explain myself. before i get accused of throwing money into machines. okay firstly, i've decided to chop off my hair! i mean it! i'm not gonna hesitate. i know i'm gonna look retarded and spastic. nono wait, MORE retarded and MORE spastic. so brace yourself people. take one last look at the sam that has long hair. it's gonna be gone! after the exams. i'm gonna find time to chop it all off. i just hope it wont turn out to bad.
reason #1. i'm sick and tired of long hair. i mean it's so hard to wash. guys wouldnt understand. but seriously! it's so hard to wash, you have to use sooo much shampoo. and it takes soooo long to dry! so yes. i'm getting rid of it.
reason #2. i wanna see how i look like with short hair. the last time i had short hair was like primary 4? or primary 1? i cant remember.
reason #3. i wanna spice up my sister's life. haha. yea, she wants to see me with short hair. so i'll do her a favour and myself a favour.
reason #4. i wanna spice up my own life! yupps. i know insults are gonna get hurled at me. just like when i got contacts. refer to my previous previous previous previous previous previous previous post to see how i got tormented. and i'm gonna let history repeat itself. well it's kinda cool. i guess. anyway, it's an experience. hair will grow back anyway.
reason #5. my hair is dead!!!!!! i mean the bottom. i have sooo many split ends. it's dry, and dead. and grass-like. when i let down my hair, i look like lion king. but then again, i still might look like lion king after i cut my hair. but oh well. i'll take the risk.
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so there you go. 5 reasons for me to cut my hair. so i wanted to take neos with my sister one last time. a lot of people say we look alike. so i wanna look like her for one last time. hah! i'm saying this as if my hair wont grow back. but it'll take a long time right? so yea, one last time. and people, blog fans who read this, please spare me the agony. i know i'm gonna look weird. alrighty, now for the neos we took!
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okay. i'm currently having some problems posting the pictures. but no worries, i'll post them up in the next post. so that was my day. alrighty, i better go. this is becoming a very very long post. lols.
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toodles ya'll. and good luck for physics paper 1!!
simple/elpmis
9:53 PM
i'm back!!!!! but exams are still on. =(
i'm BACK!!!! i know i know, there's one more paper on monday. but it's physics 1! i mean i'm gonna fail physics anyway, besides, i've completed the physics tys mcq. if that's gonna help. and that's as far as it's gonna get. i'm not gonna do anything else for physics. i hate physics! i HATE IT! why did the appple drop on newton's head? why didnt it knock him unconscious and leave him with an IQ of.. erm.. of a baby! why?? why did it have to drop when he was under THAT tree, and he had to go, "OOHHH!! so THIS is GRAVITY!! ooh... cool. now i'm gonna create stupid laws, and make pathetic students study them and go crazy. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
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okay enough of my nonsense. see, i just woke up. so, the brain isnt functioning well. so yupps. my papers so far? hmms. okok la. but i have to say. I SO SCREWED UP MY LITERATURE PAPER!!!!! WAHHHHHHHH!!!! *bangs head into the wall* i mean i couldnt understand the unseen poem!! HOW CAN I NOT UNDERSTAND THE UNSEEN POEM!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! well, when i read the poem the first time, nothing, NOTHING was in my head! it was completely blank. like a piece of paper. SO BLANK! that i started panicking, which didnt make things any better. cuz by the time i read the poem i only had half an hour left. and i couldnt understand it. and i kept looking at the clock. and the history students just had to make such a din when they left the class. and i panicked even more. -.-. and i'm pretty sure at the end of the paper, my brain turned to mush. yupps. so that was my horrible literature paper. hopefully i wont fail. =((. well, physics paper is doomed too. i mean like DURHH. the rest of the papers are fine. i hope. okok enough about exams. driving me crazy! i mean i've been studying studying studying all week for 3 weeks! i mean this is like the first saturday in 3 saturdays i'm actually sitting down on my bed, happily typing away on my laptop. if exams were still on, i'll probably be in mac studying.
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speaking of which, i think i've put on weight. i mean imagine. mac mac mac mac for 3 weeks! 3 WHOLE WEEKS! or was it 2? anyway, that's alot. and everytime i go there, i'll get a medium coke. that's like 10 spoons of sugar. maybe i'll just die of diabetes. or high blood pressure. but studying at mac isnt all that bad. yesterday, we had free apple pie! ok. here's what happened. you see, macdonalds has this fifa world cup thing going on. so the mac that we always go to, has staff from beatty. and i think they saw us there soooo often, they got sick of our faces. but that's not the point. they came over to us, and said if we answered a question about the world cup, we'd get apple pie/ sundae/ corn cup. so first, xuan answered where the fifa world cup in 2002 was held. well, being a soccer loon, i was totally blank. so yea. then next day asked cheryl may if korea was in the finals this year. well, she answered wrongly, so no apple pie for mui mui. and my turn! they asked me what colour was the jersy of netherland. o.O. i mean how should i know! whenever i watch soccer, i'll just 'support' whichever team that's wearing red. heh. yea, i watch soccer. watched, rather. cuz during that world cup period, my dad hogged the tv. so i had no choice but to watch it as well. but it was pretty fun, i'll have to admit. though most of the time i dont know what's happening. yupps. oh yes, back to the question. then tecklai, some soccer player from our school, who is also working there, mouthed to me orange. and the guy asking the question, also an ex-beattyian, kept looking at my jacket which was orange. so yea, i said orange and i had an apple pie. so xuan and i, being nice people as we are, shared our apple pie with mui. so yesterday's mac experience was pretty interesting.
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so the youth ministry in my church changed things a little recently. instead of having youth services EVERY week in the month, we have service on the first week, and 2nd and 3rd week, we go out in our life-transformation group (ltg) and on the 4th week, we have outing! at least i think that's how it goes. today's is the first time i'm going out with my ltg. so yea, hopefully things wont go too bad.
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now, onto more pressing matters. my very VERY empty wallet. as you guys know, i've been going to mac EVERDAY! which explains the empty wallet. and xuan's and mui's birthday are sooo close together! just one day apart! 16th and 17th. sheesh! so yea, the empty-er wallet. sighh. and it's after exams! that's SUCH a bad time to have an empty wallet. i mean seriously. >.<>
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toodles loyal blog fans! haha! i'm sure you guys missed me loads. but i'm back!!!! xDD.
sorry, i just like to pretend my blog is read by thousands. *_*
simple/elpmis
11:29 AM
Saturday, May 06, 2006
update on the mid-years: 6 down, 8 to go. BOO HOO!!
can someone please PLEASE get me a time machine. i want it to be 16th may. NOW! well, not because it's mui's birthday. because mid years end then. OR! i could rewind, and go back in time to when i was in nursery or kindergarten. where i couldnt care less what was around me. when my world revolved around play time and nappy time. when i didnt know so much. as they say, ignorance is bliss. alright, i shall be less melancholic here.
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i told myself i wouldnt, WOULD NOT, blog. i wouldnt come online. but what can i do? the laptop was screaming for me. i could here it calling out to me. besides, it's so hard to study for chemistry and e math. i mean chemistry is chemistry. and e math, is like a math. or maybe i'm just giving myself excuses. but! a girl has to rest. so yupp. i'm online. so anyway, the past week has been exam, study, exam, study all day long! okay, i admit, while we're at mac, we still talk. i mean we cant just study non-stop right. maybe i've put on weight. but i'll go broke at this rate. i better learn how to save money. >.<""
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today's cellgroup was pretty okay. the worship was pretty dull if you asked me. i mean they shouldnt have put all the new songs together. then we wouldnt know how to sing it. so yea, i pretty much kept quiet for half of the worship. and i so didnt know that i was suppose to play today! i didnt check the duty roster. >.<"" i didnt expect myself to be on duty today since i was suppose to be on duty last week. oh well.
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alrighty. i'm brain dead now. this is what study does to you. it turns your brain to mush. lols.
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toodles. and niteynites ya'll.
simple/elpmis
11:16 PM
Monday, May 01, 2006
sammie is back. why?
i just sent my maid off. though i didnt really like her from the start, i kinda miss her. i was really hostile to her when she first came, only this year did i not show so much resentment. i dont know why i didnt like her. but now that she's left, it's like someone missing. i mean, she's been around 24/7 for two years! but anyway, i wish her all the best in Canada. she's sooo lucky. CANADA!! unlike boring singapore. heh.
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anyway, i'm back for awhile. i really really really cant resist the computer. bad sam, BAD! heh. the chinese paper went pretty well. i felt that paper 2 was pretty easy. as in i understood the passage AND questions. but those better at chinese felt it was difficult. o.O" so... maybe i misunderstood it. but whatever it is, i hope i dont fail to badly. heh!
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i've been working on a math for the pass few days. and i can safely say that a math is pure torture! PURE TORTURE i tell you!
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there has been more and more contradictions these days. more situations that put me in a difficult spot. situations that redefine the whole meaning of dilemma. oh gosh. sometimes i wish i wasnt so indecisive. it's like being torned apart. >.<" i shant reveal to much here, where the whole world can see it. heh.
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alrighty, i'll stop here. all the best, to all, for your mid years!
simple/elpmis
10:17 AM
